How To Practice Your Listening Skills

Have you had a real conversation lately? A glut of information comes our way everyday. A lot is garbage, easily digestible and discarded with no real insight involved. This also applies to many of our conversations throughout our day where brief snippets of information help us achieve our goals and obligations but do not nurture us. While superficial conversation is practical as a social buffer, opportunity exists to delve deeper and create better connection with others. Meaningful conversation involves the development and exchange of ideas, being fully present in the dialogue, and leaving space for reflection. This is important because information has the potential to provide real insight for living our lives and solving social problems. Conversations supply us with vital feedback. Self-reflection after an encounter helps determine what was important in that exchange and how you managed your energy. Was it positive? Did you get annoyed or angry? What triggered the annoyance and what could have done to create a better outcome? This reflection can improve your conversations by allowing a non-threatening environment. A great way to create this is using unconditional positive regard. Developed by Carl Rogers, it is the act of creating an outgoing positive feeling by not evaluating or judging others but accepting without conditions. It’s quite challenging because we form opinions almost automatically and it takes effort to be non-judgmental. If we can avoid attaching conditions of worth to what others say and just be supportive, feelings of acceptance will present themselves. This will allow barriers to fall and a significant dialogue can develop. The art of listening is also important to a meaningful conversation. Using your whole attention to focus on what another person is saying is a powerful force. When you listen fully, ideas come to life and grow and creativity has a chance to flow. If one can set aside judgments and opinions, others will open up and trust will build. Not interrupting and pausing before responding to a comment are great ways to improve listening. Another is to ask yourself what needs to be said next rather than automatically responding. It can create a new path in the flow of conversation and lead to a more stimulating conversation. According to Kay Lindahl, listening is a creative force and when we truly listen by being fully present, we are using our creativity and forging a vital bond with others. So here’s a suggestion the next time you strike up a conversation. In whatever words, ask someone to say a bit more about their comment or observation. For example, if someone comment about traffic, ask his or her opinion on a good solution to traffic jams. If someone jokes about global warming, ask what he or she really thinks about the situation. You get the idea? Although, it seems pretty easy to do but it does take effort to stay engaged. Remember to be non-judgmental if their opinion differs from yours and try to see their point of view. It could expand your perception on the matter and at the very least create a positive regard. Throughout you day, look for opportunities to extend a conversation. You will be surprised at how satisfying it is to have a meaningful discussion. Category:Home › Other • Pomegranates: A newly discovered superfood • Where did the joke why did the chicken cross the road come from and why is it funny? • Can mothers diagnosed with bipolar disorder make good parents? • Spiritual evolution of human consciousness • Tips for getting a college basketball scholarship • Living with Pseudotumor cerebri (PTC) • Caring for the caregiver • Technologys impact on society